Why saying goodbye can bring you more peace
"I love you, but we have to break up."
Have you ever uttered those words? Or heard them spoken to you? Or maybe you've seen a character say them on a TV show or movie.
I never fully understood how you could love someone and simultaneously want to walk away from a relationship with that person — until I had to shift some relationships as I became more connected with my own Soul.
The more I grew into the person I authentically am, the less I could be friends with people who maintained my old limiting thoughts, beliefs, and patterns.
But I loved all these people still. I wasn't mad at them. I didn't wish to never see them again. I had years of fond memories of time spent together. I wanted nothing but happiness for them.
Despite our shared past, I knew my Soul was telling me that it was time to move on. I would hear the message loud and clear when I was left feeling energetically drained each time I hung up the phone or said goodbye after a get-together. I would be exhausted or overstimulated or even edgy sometimes.
And that's not how I want to feel. And I bet it's not what you want for yourself either.
So what are you supposed to do once you realize you're not aligned with everyone in your life?
It starts with you being honest with yourself and embracing the authentic emotions you feel whenever you interact with these friends. Then it can be as simple as taking a symbolic step back from the relationship. That could mean you reach out less to your friend, you share less personal information with her, or you do activities in groups instead of one-on-one.
And let me be clear, I'm not advocating that you callously dump your relationships on the side of the road. I didn't do that and I certainly don't think that would help anyone involved. I'm still friends with most of the people I'm talking about; I'm just not nearly as invested in the relationship as I was before.
Essentially, it's about changing the level and type of energy you bring to the relationship.
Please be gentle with yourself during this process. It's no easy feat to separate yourself from people you've been intertwined with for a long time. In some cases, I took a sloooow path (years sometimes) to fully process the reality that I no longer related and enjoyed time with some of my friends.
So acknowledge the difficulty of this process and recognize the efforts you are making.
Everything is constantly changing in these lives of ours. When you can accept that change is inevitable, you will be welcoming so much goodness — like new and more aligned friends — into your life. You just have to trust that the Universe has your back and everything will be okay. I'll leave you today with this inspiring quote.....
Do you need help with letting go of negative relationships or situations? Are you trying to surrender the outcome and release control? Email me today and we can set up a time to talk about how I can help you move forward.